March Counselor’s Corner

Classroom Presentations

• Self-Confidence
• College & Career Awareness
• Teamwork
• Understanding Others’ Perspectives

Attendance Fact:

Fresh Air & Sunshine

With Spring on the way it’s a great opportunity to get outdoors for fresh air & sunshine! That means better health. Which means better school attendance.

Did you know that school attendance is a key indicator of whether students will finish high school? A 2007 study found attendance & studying are more predictive of dropout than test scores or other student characteristics.

ATTENDANCE TODAY SHAPES SUCCESS FOR TOMORROW

Best Practice Parenting Tip

Helping Our Kids Keep a Healthy Perspective

To help our kids keep a healthy perspective on life we can avoid talking in catastrophic terms by paying attention to what we say to our kids or around them. When we say things like - “If you don’t learn to read better, they’re going to hold you back.” or another example, “It’s really important that you learn how to swim because it’d be devastating to me if you drowned.” 

When we talk catastrophically, they lose a sense of control or power in their life & some kids are certain that these things WILL certainly happen to them. Remember kids are concrete (literal) thinkers & have not had enough life experiences yet to know the probability of happenings.

The truth is catastrophe rarely happens, & yet the what-ifs we plant in their heads can cause a tremendous amount of anxiety, worry, & fear. Fear is paralyzing & stops their ability to build resilience. We feel like we are doing them a favor by giving them the worst-case scenarios, but it can actually backfire. Instead of pushing them forward, it puts a sudden halt in their progression.

It is important to - stop - think - & force ourselves into rational, healthy thinking. Our kids are watching, hearing & feeling everything we are, but without adult brain development & life experience. Instead, don’t focus solely on the problem. Focus on what we can do to help develop a healthy outcome. Focus on the great things we can & will learn during difficult situations. Undoubtedly, we will come out of it stronger & wiser, especially if that’s what our intent is.



February Counselor’s Corner

Attendance Fact

Keep Your Child Healthy & in School

Unfortunately, our school attendance has dropped - mostly due to illness. Nutrition, sleep, exercise, & good hygiene can help kids stay healthy & in school. Making sure they get a good breakfast, maintain a regular bedtime & staying active all play a part in strengthening their immune system. Stress hand washing, especially before eating & after using the restroom. Teach them to cover coughs & sneezes with a tissue or cough/sneeze into an elbow. Also, avoid close contact with those who are sick & be sure not to share cups or utensils.

Best Practice Parenting Tip

Building Intrinsic Motivation in Our Kids

Extrinsic motivation is doing things for an external reward - like money, treats, fame, grades... or to avoid punishment. Intrinsic motivation is doing things because it’s personally rewarding - we feel good about ourselves & the person we are trying to become - we do things because it is the right thing to do. Although most of us are driven somewhat by external motivators, research shows people who are driven more by intrinsic motivators have better satisfaction in life, build better relationships, & have a deeper appreciation of who they are. So, how do we help develop intrinsic motivation in our kids?

• Avoid giving too many external rewards. External rewards become addicting - driving the extrinsic motivation. It trains kids to feel like they’ve been cheated or that they failed when there is no external reward, shutting down the intrinsic drive to do good because of how it makes them feel. Doing good is its own reward, it gives warm feelings of success & satisfaction inside.
• Avoid rewarding behavior or for things that are expected - like helping out in the family, going to school, or having good manners. Good people do these things because it’s right & feels good.
• Offer PRAISE for achievement. Achievement means something that took hard work or a certain amount of mental toughness. Research shows most kids are praised too often, too publicly, too over-the-top for things that a normal person wouldn't consider worthy of praise. When we praise simple things, it interferes with building intrinsic motivation because of the lack of genuine truthfulness. Keep your eyes peeled for true accomplishment & acknowledge it by saying things like - “I bet that makes you feel good inside.” or “Awesome, that’s what good people do.” A simple smile, thumbs-up, high five, & a kind note have been proven to be highly effective in building intrinsic motivation.

When it comes to building intrinsic motivation, focus on genuine small statements or gestures, staying away from monetary external rewards or over the top celebrations. This will help give our kids a happier, more satisfying life driven by inner good feelings.

January Counselor’s Corner – School Counselor – Elise Hanson 

January Counselor Classroom Presentations

• Lifelong Learner
• (Intrinsic) Motivation
• Manners
• Nutrition
• Ownership

Attendance Fact: A Partnership

Healthy school attendance requires a partnership between parents & school. Sometimes families need additional support or referrals to help their children succeed. If your child’s attendance is struggling let’s work together to find a solution that can improve their attendance & in turn improve their learning opportunities. You’re welcome to call the school or email me at elise.hanson@nsanpete.org.

Best Practice Parenting Tip – Teaching Kids to Regulate Emotions

Helping our kids learn to manage their emotions gives them self-control & lets them feel in charge of their life. Emotional management is a key element of strength & resilience.

We want to teach our kids that ALL emotions are okay. “It’s okay to feel upset or disappointed after you lose your baseball game, but it’s not okay to throw your baseball bat.” “It’s okay to be frustrated when something is difficult at school, but it’s not okay to treat your teacher poorly, crumple up your paper, give up, or start to cry.” First, help them recognize what emotions they're feeling. Then, help them think through what the appropriate next step is.

Kids learn quickly which powerful emotions get them what they want. We as parents can learn what to do with their emotions to help them build good skills. Here is an example of what we might say, “I can understand why you feel that way. I’d feel the same way if I were in your shoes, but now you need to figure out what the appropriate way is to handle this. I’m happy to help you.”

If your child is throwing a tantrum, be clear about what behavior is appropriate or inappropriate. You might say, “I’m sorry we’re not going to get ice cream, but your behavior is unacceptable. You need to take a deep breath & get your emotions in control. You’ve got this, it will be okay.”

Remember, the very best way to help kids learn self-control is by our example. As we manage our emotions appropriately, they see our resilience & learn powerful life skills. It’s important to be aware of our own emotions & what we are teaching our children through our example.

December Counselor’s Corner

December Counselor Classroom Presentations

·     Judgement - Notice the good

·     Kindness – Pass it on

Attendance Facts:     Being On Time to School

Nightly Routines Help Preparing for school the night before can make a big difference in being to school on time. Create a nightly routine that includes setting out school clothes for the next day with backpacks & lunches ready to go. Following the same routine each night also helps kids fall to sleep easier. For optimal learning 9-11 hours of sleep is recommended.

FYI

This year our teachers are teaching weekly Social Emotional Lessons from the Second Steps Program. You’re welcome to contact me or your child’s teacher if you would like to review any of the lessons.

Best Practice Parenting Tip – Communicating With Teachers

Having healthy open communication with our child’s teachers is one of the most important things we can do to benefit our child during their educational years. Never underestimate the contribution teachers make in our child’s life. Those who are willing to teach, aid, & inspire us to flourish, are priceless. We are lucky to have highly trained professionals working with our children many hours a day, helping them develop needed skills for success. Our attitude towards & about our child's teacher is VITAL in setting the foundation for what our children will learn. Here are a few things to keep in mind:

• Our child should see, hear, & feel that we respect, trust & appreciate their teachers. If our child does not witness & feel that from us - it will only hurt our child’s learning because they tend to follow our cues.
• It’s important to let our child see the value we feel in the village (all those supporting & helping us). Every extra person willing to invest in our child is of great value to us, but even more value to them. Many healthy connections give a child support, security, & a sense of belonging & importance. Encourage & appreciate healthy connection to others.
• Be sure to keep everyone in the communication loop - meaning make sure there is a triangle communication between parent, teacher, & child. When we cut out any one of the three, things break down & unhealthy manipulation may develop. An example: A child telling their teacher one thing & their parents something else. Having an open 3 way communication doesn’t allow for unhealthy practices to happen, thus keeping the child safe & accountable.

November Counselor’s Corner

Hi, I’m Elise Hanson, the school counselor. I’m excited to be at Spring City Elementary on Mondays and Wednesdays. The other days I am at Fountain Green Elementary. I’d like to share with you a little about professional school counselors. School counselors are licensed with a master’s degree. We follow the Utah College and Career Readiness School Counseling Program Model, serving 100% or our students.

Elementary school counselors play an integral role in preparing students to be college and career ready. They provide academic, personal, social, and life skills development opportunities that are necessary for student success and lifelong learning by visiting classrooms weekly. This year we will be learning the “ABCs of Success – Essential Skills of a Learner”.  We have learned about the importance of Attendance. Upcoming topics include choosing appropriate Behaviors, effective Communication, & Determination. We also help students by meeting individually and in small group settings, when requested. Please let me know if there is anything I can help you or your students with.  You’re welcome to contact me at elise.hanson@nsanpete.org or leave a message with Bobette.